people change, even the person you thought you knew the most, changes. and even though it hurts to see them go; you have to move on, for the memories are all you have, and things might never be the same.
I noticed that most of my tumblr posts are negative towards myself. I guess when I’m around my friends, I look at myself and see how different I am. I’m not as skinny as them, I don’t have a great sense of style as them, I don’t have that bubbly non awkward personality like them, and I just don’t have their looks.When people comment on my pictures and say you’re so pretty, you’re gorgeous, ect. (not trying to act conceited in anyway) but I just don’t believe them. Friends only say that because…we’re friends. Like what friend would call you ugly or hideous in a non joking way. Yeah, none. I hate having such a low self esteem. I can’t help hating myself. I just wish I had confidence..
Because in the real world, it doesn’t matter if you’re the prettiest girl in the whole grade, if you lost your virginity at age 13, if your parents let you spend however much money you want, if your hair is frizzy, if you didn’t have a boyfriend throughout high school, if people spread vicious rumors about you.
you know when you drift away from someone, and you really miss them. But eventually you forget about them and it's not too big a deal anymore...but then you get reminded of them somehow and then you miss them again? i hate that
Day 1 - Seven things that cross your mind a lot. Day 2 - Six things you love. Day 3 - Five songs you like. Day 4 - Four things you wish you could say, but might never. Day 5 - Three things you miss. Day 6 - Two things you want. Day 7 - One story of a memory you have.
Day 22- What makes you different from everyone else Hmm..I think I’m bipolar. BAHHA kidding idunno maybe I am. I think I’m different ‘cause I’m really quiet, but underneath it all, I’m really obnoxious. It’s kind of like I put up this shield as a test for people to become my friend. It’s really hard for me to trust people, so I don’t have many friends either.
Day 23- Something you crave for a lot Chocolate..DUH
Day 24- A letter to your parents Dear you two, I wish you’d get along & make sacrifices for the three children you had together, because at some point, you did love each other. You can’t just throw it all away…or atleast just be friends. I guess you don’t realize the type of affect this has on us. -Love always, me
Day 25- What I would find in your bag Phone, Ipod, Keys, Camera, Wallet, Makeup, Random receipts & candy wrappers, ahhah
Day 26- What you think about your friends I love them & I’ll always be there for them and I know they’d do the same for me
Day 27- Why are you doing this 30 day challenge I just felt like it
It was alright even though I got burnt all over & I have a tanline -__- Now, I’m gonna look so bad at the Miss NABA Pageant..COOOL. I’m stressing ‘cause it’s in exactly a week & I don’t have my dress or sports outfit yet. FML. Oh & I still need to do my summer reading :( POOP.
4538.) The way you look. The way you feel. And how I am so lost without you. I don’t know what I’d do without you in this world. You’re a part of me. You mean everything. And if anything were to happen to you, my world would fall apart. I’m not sure if you know how much you mean to me, but if you don’t, I want you to know. You complete me. I love you.(via blogconfession)
I was just thinking about Freshman year. Just thinking about everything I missed out on & stuff. The first thing that came to mind was semi. I wish I went to semi. I mean, how often does that come around? EB is so cheap that we don’t even have homecomings or a Junior Prom. I have to wait three years for another opportunity. I had my dress & everything. I was looking forward to it for 2 years, but then plans changed & I realized that a lot of my friends weren’t going, so I decided to go to Asian Night instead. Asian Night was definitely not worth skipping semi. All I remember was leaving with tears running down my face & going home straight to bed and on the phone with one of my best friends. It was horrible. The worst part was the week of semi..everyone was so hyped & getting ready. All I heard were the girls talking about how perfect it would be..their hair, makeup, dress, everything. Not only was that bad, but the week after semi, no one would stop talking about how amazing it was & how much they wanted to do it again. There were even pictures up in the cafeteria. It was so upsetting for me. Just thinking about it, I really wish I didn’t skip semi ‘cause now I just regret it. Two years of waiting..down the drain.
Wow, I honestly think I just lost all respect for you.
If you aren’t gonna treat me right, then why should I respect you? You don’t respect me, so I won’t respect you back. It’s as simple as that. No more you, no drama, no problems, no confusion. Done, period :)
1: Describe your first kiss and who was it with It was in December, after watching a movie. We were about to leave & we were just walking outside in the middle of the road for some reason. There was snow everywhereWe suddenly just stopped and talked for a couple minutes & then it just happened. It was with some boy..obviously, hahaha.
2: Describe your first make out session and who was it with I don’t even remember. It was either at the movies or on Valentine’s Day. I don’t know how to describe a makeout session.
3: Describe your first relationship Currently in my first “real” one. I’ll put up our story later? ..I’m too lazy.
4: Describe your last relationship Uhmm..it wasn’t really anything too serious. It was like almost two weeks? He was my best friend, and we just kind of realized that we were better off as just best friends..not boyfriend & girlfriend.
5: List all of your ex’s and how long you lasted Chris-almost two weeks
6: List all your crushes Cristiano Ronaldo, Sean Faris, Nick Jonas
7: List all your MAJOR crushes Justin Moy, bahahh
8: Who do you like right now and why? Justin Moy. Just kidding..I love him, because he’s my boyfriend & idunno, I just do!
9: How far have you gone with anyone? Uhmm..that’s a bit personal, don’t cha think? :/
10: Describe your last kiss I don’t remember? It was last week before the last time I saw Justin. It was just a goodbye kiss.
11: Who was the last person you held hands with? I don’t remember, hahah. Probably one of my siblings
12: Who was the last person that you liked/crushed on The person that I like/am crushing on at the moment..Justin Moy.
13: Describe the first time you got hurt. How am I supposed to remember?
14: Describe the last time you got hurt. Idunno.
15 :Do you have feelings for anyone? write a letter to them Dear my Werewolf, I miss you. I hope you’re having fun on your trip! I’m at my dad’s & I still need to pack. I’m leaving tomorrow morning, and I won’t be home when you get back..but I promise we’re gonna hangout as soon as I do! The family’s leaving for Boston the day after & my mom said you can come. You should, so we can have our 10month-aversary dinner there :))) I probably won’t go if you don’t, so I can like have the house to myself & you know..get murdered. The usual, right? HAHAH. Kidding. I love you. I hope you’re like safe & didn’t get eaten. -Always, Bear<3[:
I don’t wanna sound conceited. To be honest, people tell me I’m pretty all the time. The thing is, sometimes, I really don’t care about what people think. I don’t wana just look pretty, but I actually wanna feel pretty. All these flaws that I have make me way too insecure. I hate it. When people compliment me, I usually deny it. Most people hate that, but it’s extremely rare for me to have confidence. I wish my personality was…different when it comes to things like this :/ Cause maybe then I’d find beauty within myself..natural beauty that is.